Why do I feel the urge to make everyone HAPPY?

Being Happy and making other people Happy. You just can’t please everyone.

Strong Women with Mood Disorders

Somewhere deep down inside me since I was a little girl I’ve had this urge, desire and deep compassion to help the wounded. Call it second nature, a natural instinct, a calling or an addiction. I would feel an emptiness inside me as if I was not whole if I passed someone by in need without doing something-anything about it.

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I can not tell you how this started because I don’t know. What I do know is that I cannot stop thinking about or wanting to help people. It will keep me up at night if I have not solved a problem, nurtured, consoled, listened, hugged, gave advice, fed, cleaned or made someone smile. It’s not entirely a bad thing in others eyes, and its not. What drives me mad about this: I’m always struggling with these questions? “Do I want to make others happy because I’m not happy?” “Am I really…

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Exploring Pasir Ris Farmway

For Animal Lovers in Singapore

The Lion Raw

As one of the three remaining farmways in Singapore (the other two being Murai Farmway and Seletar West Farmway), Pasir Ris Farmway is perhaps the most recently built of the lot. Today it is perhaps best known for the many pet farms, animal shelters and fish farms along its three farmways.

A familiar sight greets you as you enter Pasir Ris Farmway from Pasir Ris Drive 12 A familiar sight greets you as you enter Pasir Ris Farmway from Pasir Ris Drive 12

Just one of the many fish farms around the area Just one of the many fish farms around the area

Pasir Ris farmway started out mainly as a site for farms rearing freshwater fish towards the late 1970s, having been shifted from the main Pasir Ris-Loyang area as the development of residential properties started coming about.

At present, Pasir Ris Farmway is home to an interestingly visible conflict between places like Ericsson Pet Farm andAnimal Lovers League, both of which are practically situated almost side-by-side. While Ericsson sells its pedigree…

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A true tribute to women

Bollywood actress Kalki Koechlin wrote a strong monologue for a solo performance at the 13th Indian Today Conclave on International Women’s Day on March 8. The monologue, which she dubbed as ‘Just Another Rant’, is a frustrated ode to women everywhere chained and bound by traditional patriarchy.

Here’s the full text of her monologue:

You remember in the beginning?

'Five husbands! That can't be fun, God know I have enough trouble with one': Kalki Koechlin writes a monologue on Women's Day

Kalki Koechlin

In the beginning God made man.

God made man in his own image.

And then that’s was it. ‘Man’kind, hu’man’ity, wo’man.

Man, man, man.

What chance in Hell did we ever have?

We were sidelined from the Big Bang.

You remember Draupadi?

Draupadi married off to all five Pandavas.

She garlanded only Arjun

But they told her you got to marry all of us.

Five husbands! That can’t be fun.

God know I have enough trouble with one.

Or what about Eve and the apple?

Blaming one woman for all mankind’s evil?

Soorya and Kunti,

The Virgin Mary

Do you know Gaia?

The Goddess Mother Earth

She’s the one we all trample on.

And remember Aphrodite

Goddess of love and beauty

Lest we forget, she was also

The patron of prostituting.

Persephone,

She was less known

Raped by Hades

She became Queen of the underworld,

Not even goddesses were left alone.

You might not know A’isha,

She was one of the wives of Prophet Mohammad

She challenged a Califh for power

It created quite a ruckus,

It led to war in fact,

All because of one woman’s fuss,

And so was born the tradition Islamic

That women should not engage in anything politic.

But of course they did,

Thank god they did.

Women have their ways,

As somebody once put it.

The Queen of Sheba, Empress Theodora, Rabia al’ Basra,

Cleopatra, The Victorian Era, The Mona Lisa

The Suffragettes, Marilyn Monroe, The sixties and burning bras,

The unpopular Thatcher and our own Indira

Et cetra et cetra and now here we are.

Here we are,

We’ve survived this far,

Thanks to seduction, perhaps some manipulation,

But mostly thanks to Mother Nature and ovulation.

Now look at all the queens and goddesses of history,

No prince came to the rescue,

No king ever went down on one knee,

No deity was even that trustworthy,

Yet all we’ve be told since we were three,

Are fairy tales, adverts, and pretty stories,

Telling us to pray, hope,

And wait to be saved.

Here we are today.

Here we are,

On International Women’s Day,

With some minor disappointments,

And a few little things to say.

The woman in red,

The girl in pink,

The widow in white,

The Burqa in black,

The colour of lipstick,

Viva Glam, Lady Danger, Fresh brew, Faux, Frenzy, Hot Gossip and Sweetie.

Ramblin, Siss, Creme cup, Paramount and Modesty

Fetish, Spice it up, Naked Paris, Honey love and Odyssey.

Apply, line, smack, seal, pout,

And you’re ready to go out.

Ugh!!!

Sometimes I just want an oversized T shirt, boxer shorts, unkempt hair and unibrows.

I want armpit hair long enough to plait,

I want a clean face without a trace of make up

I want to look the way I do when I wake up.

I want to scratch my head,

Dig my nose,

Lick my fingers,

Stretch my legs

And spread my toes.

I want to smile with my gums showing,

Bare my teeth and

Contort my pretty face into wrinkles.

I want my crow’s feet to look sexy,

Or my salt and pepper hair,

Or my sun burnt skin,

I want to be George Clooney basically,

But with breasts and a muffin.

Alas,

No…no…shhh…control, control!

Keep it down.

Stuff it up, bottle it in, switch it off,

Cross your legs, wear a bra,

Sit straight and smile sweetly for the camera.

I went to a party,

I went to a party where

I was looking for something real.

Glittering, flashing lights,

Sparkling clean glasses with something bubbly and expensive inside,

Stuck on smiles of painted lips and gorgeous, skinny, beautiful ladies all around,

I craved a touch, a caress,

But my senses were intimidated by cloned perfection.

I thought I could hear muffled wailing,

Nervous giggling,

Intoxicated complying.

I thought I could hear the buzz of millions, screaming out their instructions,

Sit down, stand up, stay,

This way, that way, go away

I can’t breathe, I’m choking.

This room is filled with smoke

From regrets and weak, nicely packaged cigarettes.

This room is filled with luxury and fame

And false dreams.

My problem with traditional desi marriage

Love, InshAllah

Eds. Note: This is a response to yesterday’s guest post, How I met my son’s mother. Have a perspective to share on love and relationships? Read our guidelines, here.

Update 11/26/13: Congratulations to writer Aisha Saeed on this post being chosen by the editors of WordPress for Freshly Pressed, highlighting the best posts on WordPress. In an email to LoveinshAllah.com, WordPress said: “Aisha Saeed’s response to your guest post about arranged marriages was a really powerful and articulate call for fairness and equality. She delivers her points with a great balance of passion and reason, which makes this piece engaging even for those who aren’t intimate with the debate surrounding marriage in south Asian communities. It’s a great post that deserves a wider audience.”

aisha

 

There’s a befuddling conundrum afoot in the desi (South Asian) community. You must first understand a few things:

a) For whatever reason…

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Teen entrepreneur Avani Singh: “You can make a difference”

TED Blog

New Delhi’s streets are epic — trucks, cars, cows and, especially, bicycle rickshaws, three-wheeled carriers that can zip through traffic, pedaled by a very, very hard-working driver. Growing up in New Delhi, Avani Singh passed them every day on her way to school. And her route also passed the city’s slums. In this city of 17 million, the New Delhi slums are zones of poverty that stretch for miles. To Avani as a young girl, they seemed just a part of the city, always there, unchanging. But as she grew older, it began to dawn on her: Not everyone had what she had. And she could help.

Meanwhile, she learned in the news about a new kind of bicycle rickshaw. Bright green and super futuristic, it was electric-powered, thanks to a solar panel on the roof. Which made it easier to pedal. Avani, then only 16 years old, had the…

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Promise Yourself

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To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel
that there is something in them
To look at the sunny side of everything
and make your optimism come true.

To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.
To live in faith that the whole world is on your side
so long as you are true to the best that is in you.”
― Christian D. Larson